Based on the novel with the same name, the romantic comedy The Kissing Booth features high school junior Elle Evans and her best friend Lee Flynn organizing a kissing booth for a school fundraiser. Elle has harbored a secret crush on Lee’s older brother, Noah, for years, but can’t act on it because of a rule both Elle and Lee have agreed on: no dating each other’s relatives. At the kissing booth, however, Elle and Noah end up kissing and starting a relationship, unbeknownst to everyone else. For a movie intended to portray an innocent coming-of-age romance, The Kissing Booth is rife with the sexual objectification of women and toxic masculinity.
Even at the very start of the film, Elle is catcalled by a crowd of boys at her school due to her short skirt. Visibly uncomfortable with the attention, Elle awkwardly walks towards the school when Tuppen, a guy she doesn’t know, slaps her butt. Lee immediately steps up to fight Tuppen but seeing that Lee was unprepared, Noah punches Tuppen instead, resulting in them both brawling on the ground.
Despite this violent defense in the face of those objectifying her, The Kissing Booth still fails to convincingly characterize this objectification as demeaning and wrong. Before they even get to school, Lee points out Elle’s skirt, commenting, “Seriously though, cover up, I’m trying to drive.” It’s disappointing and harmful to see one of the movie’s protagonists play into the idea that clothes are distracting and any resulting sexual thoughts are the fault of women. Furthermore, later in detention, Noah tells Elle, “Wearing a skirt like that is asking for it.” Clothing, no matter how revealing, does not equate to sexual consent. The stereotype that women “ask for it” through their choice of clothing blames the victim and minimizes the responsibility of the harasser.
The film’s most grievous harm, however, is portraying Tuppen as a viable love interest for Elle rather than the aggressor he is. Tuppen sends notes to Elle in class and asks her out, as Elle laughs and blushes in response, flattered by the attention. Her complete acceptance of his romantic advances despite him touching her without her consent mere days before sends a message that male validation, in any form, should be appreciated and reciprocated. To make matters worse, Elle even agrees to go on a date with Tuppen, ultimately erasing all the consequences of his assault on Elle.
Noah’s relationship with Elle is not immune to criticism either. Throughout the movie, he displays violent, controlling, and possessive tendencies. Tuppen never shows up to take Elle on a date, and when questioned, he admits that it’s because Noah told the whole school not to date her. When Elle tells Noah to stop overseeing her love life, he refuses. He doesn’t recognize her individuality and takes his own liberties to govern her personal relationships.
Furthermore, he’s shown participating in—and winning—multiple fights, from childhood to present day, where he is constantly stepping in to “protect” Elle. After he gets into yet another brawl on her behalf, she rushes out, Noah tailing behind her. He repeatedly tells her to get in his car to no avail. It isn’t until he angrily slaps the hood of his car and yells at Elle that she freezes with visible shock before slowly turning around and following his direction. While masked as possessive and “romantic,” Noah’s desperate toxic masculinity is emotional abuse. The most concerning part of it all, however, is how everyone establishes his violence as commonplace. In her narration, Elle expresses no concern over these outbursts, and Lee, Noah’s own brother, expects violence from him. In fact, when Lee catches Noah cleaning up Elle’s injury, he automatically assumes Noah hit her. Even after both Noah and Elle insist Noah did nothing, Lee doesn’t believe either of them.
In addition, Elle and Noah’s relationship falls under the classic “girl who has never been kissed meets boy who is a known womanizer” trope. Elle’s inexperience makes for an uncomfortable power dynamic. In one of their first romantic moments, it is revealed that Noah actually took Elle to the spot he takes every girl he is involved with. Just before that, Elle has to explicitly insist that she refuses to be just one of the many, demonstrating how Noah doesn’t view his romantic interests as individual people but only as what they can do for him. This situation becomes even more concerning when Elle’s role in Noah and Lee’s relationship is unveiled. After Lee finds out about Noah and Elle’s relationship, he laments about how all his life Noah has gotten everything he has except for Elle, until now. Both Noah and Lee view Elle as a “thing” to be had rather than a person in her own right.
Finally, The Kissing Booth deludes its viewers into thinking that they too can be the exception to a boy’s “player” tendencies and “fix” their partner in a relationship. When Noah opens up about his anger issues, Elle is the one that tells him that he can change. She constantly gets in the middle of Noah’s fights, trying to calm him down and defuse the tension. Moreover, Elle is the catalyst in Noah and Lee resolving their differences at the end of the movie.
While literary genres such as dark romance that romanticize abusive and possessive relationships have recently increased in popularity, it is important to understand that an uneven power dynamic within a relationship is never healthy. According to Domestic Violence Services, “nearly 1.5 million high school students nationwide experience physical abuse from a dating partner in a single year.” Ultimately, The Kissing Booth attempts to portray a sweet love story but in actuality, parrots toxic gender dynamics and stereotypes.
